Calm Down Dear, It's Only My Cock.
This design is gonna make no sense to anyone outside the UK so I will try and set the scene. On telly, we have these commercials featuring the famous movie director Michael Winner. He plays himself and also dresses up in drag playing a lady version of himself. Naturally, as ladies are wont to do, hysteria sets in and the male Michael Winner says "Calm down Dear, it's only a commercial". Oh how we, as a nation, collectively laughed. Well, not a lot but it has kind of become a chatchphrase.

Then I got thinking - I have a sneaking like for Mr Winner. His laughing chubby face always puts a smile on mine and I love the fact that this enormoman shags lots of young chicks. Power to him. Alas, my brain being the slightly twisted mass of neural pathways that it is, it moved proceedings into the bedroom area. Now, on that first night, what does Mr Winner say to the new young lady who has probably never witnessed a naked male over the age of about 30. And oh how Mr Winner has let himself go! So I guessed that he might say "Calm down Dear, it's only my cock" and a T-shirt legend is born...

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Most of our prints are available on

Standard T-Shirt (S-4XL)	Long Sleeve T-Shirt (S-XXL) + £1.00 for this style	Wife Beater Vest (S-XXL) + £2.00 for this style
Skinny Fit T-Shirt (One Size ONLY) + £1.00 for this style	Skinny Fit Vest (One Size ONLY) available in black only + £1.00 for this style	Hoodies (S-3XL) + £10 for this style

With the following colour combinations

So be as crazy and inventive as you like and use these pulldowns to make YOUR selection!