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Respect Me For Who I Am OR I WILL KILL YOU
I am going to tell you about the one Tarantino Moment I ever had. Everyone
should have at least one of these in their life. It could never occur
again for two reasons: 1) It happened in an airport and you cannot do ANYTHING
in airports any more - they barely allow you on the plans and, 2) I was smoking,
within the airport (apart from the fact that you can no longer smoke anywhere, I
also quit smoking too. Mr No Fun, huh). Anyway, I was strutting
around the airport, as one does (when one was bored, on the dole and lived near
an airport) when some ne'er-do-well commented on my attire. Well, I was
going through a major Pulp Fiction / Natural Born Killers phase so I turned
around, asked them to repeat it and then followed them, looking a bit
menacing. They then sat down (did I mention there were two of them?) so I
sat right next to the comment maker, smoking my fag, in silence. He was
shifting around awkwardly in his chair, obviously very uncomfortable. I
leant over and tapped my cigarette ash right into his lap. No reaction
(although he did go VERY red). So I did it again. And again.
In fact, I sat, smoked my whole cigarette disgarding ALL the ash into his lap,
in total silence. When finished, I merely got up and left.
Honest to God, it looked so damn cool and it
taught that rapscallion a lesson he will never forget: Don't say annoying things
to men with long hair and cowboy boots. Hell yeah!
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